Bipolar Affirmation

Red water - yellow blood,
Reflections of warped mind - mud,
Shadows in my mind's eye,
Who and what and where am I?

Tripping over - falling slowly,
In this world I feel so lonely,
In this void that I call home,
Idiots usurp the throne.

Where'm I going - where've I been,
All the things I've done and seen,
Have left me feeling old and empty,
Still trying to find that land of plenty.

Marooned in a rudderless boat,
Blind madmen keep us afloat,
I know what's right but I'm not in control,
I'll surely die in this wet black hole.

Moving down this bottomless pit,
I think I'm alive but I feel shit,
My eyes are open but don't want to see,
The so-called friends that claim to love me.

Distant now, the end is near,
My friends are gone although they're here,
Through their eyes at last I see,
The colour of their gross insincerity.

Embryos for blackmail, access to gwat,
One by one into the trap,
I've gotta hold out, I must be strong,
Those pale reflections will see they're wrong.

Leave me, leave me, I'm going down.
At last I'll wear my thorns of crown,
I am different - I am me,
Without a doubt the superior specie.

Fuck you all!

  Post-coital poem - written in bed at 03h00, with my girlfriend curled up behind me.
  Pretoria, South Africa, 24 months after my father's funeral.